MENTORING MYTHS
Myth #1: I don’t have enough time to mentor.
Mentoring does take time; however, there are many ways to incorporate mentoring into your everyday life. The mentor and mentee (with parent’s consent) decide on their mode of communication and times. Weekly phone calls can be done on your commute from work or maybe your mentee prefers to text. Face to face meetings can consist of things you already planned as part of your normal routine like working out, dinner, church, movies, etc.
Myth #2: I am not perfect, so I can’t mentor.
To the contrary. The best mentors are those who have made mistakes and learned from them, in the process of learning from them or are still trying to figure it out. Youth need someone that they can relate to and learn from. Mentor training will provide you with the opportunity to build all the skills that are needed.
Myth #3: I don’t have enough money to mentor.
There are a number of low and no cost activities that you can do with your mentee such as hiking, hobbies, cycling, basketball, firework shows, outdoor concerts, etc. In fact, it is the low cost activities that often have the most impact because they give you the opportunity to get to know your mentee and catchup on what’s going on in their lives.
Myth #4: I don’t have kids, I can’t be a mentor.
You do not need to be a parent to make a difference in a youth’s life. You just need to enjoy spending time with youth. Mentors have a very different role in the life of youth than a parent.
Myth #5: The mentee is the only one that learns.
Mentoring is a condition that arises out of an effective relationship. It takes time to build. Mentoring happens when partners trust and feel accepted by each other. Mentoring allows the mentor to learn a new perspective and to learn by teaching. Mentors find themselves sometimes challenging their own thinking and values.
Myth #6 – I don’t know how to mentor.
Mentoring is not fixing a youth. Mentoring is providing a support system and sounding board to a youth. The mentee is doing all the work and the mentor is just there in the background giving encouragement, instructions and guidance that they have picked up along the way in their own battles. Mentor training will provide you with the opportunity to build all the skills that are needed.
Myth #7 – I think I need my own mentor first.
You don’t need all the answers before you start mentoring. As a matter of fact, you will never have all the answers. Letting your mentee know this is key to building a trusting relationship.
Myth #8: Mentors tell you what to do.
A mentor’s role is to give an outside perspective, listen, share their own experiences, give honest and constructive feedback, and provide unbiased support and encouragement. A mentor should never tell you what to do.
Myth #9: You need to be old to be a mentor.
Age is irrelevant; however, experience relevant to your mentee, the ability to listen for understanding, and refraining from passing judgment are essential.
Myth #10: Mentoring is only for youth in trouble.
Most youth have had some sort of behavioral incident at one time or another, but the vast majority of youth do not have significant behavioral problems. Mentoring is so much more than getting someone out of trouble; although occasionally you may be called upon for advice in this type of situation. Mentoring is helping someone find their path in life. Youth are seeking out a mentor to assist them in fulfilling their dreams.
Mentoring does take time; however, there are many ways to incorporate mentoring into your everyday life. The mentor and mentee (with parent’s consent) decide on their mode of communication and times. Weekly phone calls can be done on your commute from work or maybe your mentee prefers to text. Face to face meetings can consist of things you already planned as part of your normal routine like working out, dinner, church, movies, etc.
Myth #2: I am not perfect, so I can’t mentor.
To the contrary. The best mentors are those who have made mistakes and learned from them, in the process of learning from them or are still trying to figure it out. Youth need someone that they can relate to and learn from. Mentor training will provide you with the opportunity to build all the skills that are needed.
Myth #3: I don’t have enough money to mentor.
There are a number of low and no cost activities that you can do with your mentee such as hiking, hobbies, cycling, basketball, firework shows, outdoor concerts, etc. In fact, it is the low cost activities that often have the most impact because they give you the opportunity to get to know your mentee and catchup on what’s going on in their lives.
Myth #4: I don’t have kids, I can’t be a mentor.
You do not need to be a parent to make a difference in a youth’s life. You just need to enjoy spending time with youth. Mentors have a very different role in the life of youth than a parent.
Myth #5: The mentee is the only one that learns.
Mentoring is a condition that arises out of an effective relationship. It takes time to build. Mentoring happens when partners trust and feel accepted by each other. Mentoring allows the mentor to learn a new perspective and to learn by teaching. Mentors find themselves sometimes challenging their own thinking and values.
Myth #6 – I don’t know how to mentor.
Mentoring is not fixing a youth. Mentoring is providing a support system and sounding board to a youth. The mentee is doing all the work and the mentor is just there in the background giving encouragement, instructions and guidance that they have picked up along the way in their own battles. Mentor training will provide you with the opportunity to build all the skills that are needed.
Myth #7 – I think I need my own mentor first.
You don’t need all the answers before you start mentoring. As a matter of fact, you will never have all the answers. Letting your mentee know this is key to building a trusting relationship.
Myth #8: Mentors tell you what to do.
A mentor’s role is to give an outside perspective, listen, share their own experiences, give honest and constructive feedback, and provide unbiased support and encouragement. A mentor should never tell you what to do.
Myth #9: You need to be old to be a mentor.
Age is irrelevant; however, experience relevant to your mentee, the ability to listen for understanding, and refraining from passing judgment are essential.
Myth #10: Mentoring is only for youth in trouble.
Most youth have had some sort of behavioral incident at one time or another, but the vast majority of youth do not have significant behavioral problems. Mentoring is so much more than getting someone out of trouble; although occasionally you may be called upon for advice in this type of situation. Mentoring is helping someone find their path in life. Youth are seeking out a mentor to assist them in fulfilling their dreams.
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